March Ninth 2010 Morning

So yesterday wasn't so bad. Mama L swore much more than I'm used to. It was kinda weird. She was telling me all sorts of things I wonder if I just never noticed before or maybe she was talking to me like I'm a big girl. I don't know. I'm feeling pretty calm today. Okay, all concern out the window, this is what's going on. I've known several people that have been addicted to porn. I mean, it turns me on, but to do that...as frequently as they do, or have, its not possible! I don't get it. I am disgusted by them now... If anyone reads this that is addicted to porn, please explain it to me...

March Eighth 210 8:06am

Today is the big day! Really nervous .SOrry it took me so long to get back here, not that I have any followers but well its hard because Alex is always around and if he notices that I'm sharing thoughts with the web he thinks he can read them. He likes knowing my mind. This is all I have to say really. Yesterday I went to Church in Kleefeld. A lot of people who I wasn't really close to were pretending we were pals and it was weird. It was nice though to see my friends. And expose Alex to more of my love places. I should get ready, I'm being picked up in 50 minutes. SO EXCITED! Get to chill with my mommy...my mommy... I feel like I'm lying lol. Take care...Wish me luck.

March Sixth 2010 Sometime...

***Drunk***

March Sixth 2010 11:13am

So last night I got cut off cuz he showed up. Today, he is at the clinic...checking to see whats wrong, his throat is infected and they think it may be mono. Sick! What I would like to know is how one gets mono? I didn't give it to him, my throat is fine, his better be too lol because if he has mono, then we're kinda gonna have to be kiss free for a few weeks. Can we do that? haha I don't know. His haircut, is okay, looked a little strange the way the curls were going lol I love his hair long. He has my keys so he has to check the mail cuz my social worker called and said they sent the cheque...

March Fifth 2010 Eight pm

So today was great, paid off some bills for once, I think I'm doing pretty good. I'm trying to remain calm but my LANDLORD came to my door this evening to tell me about my rent. How could I possibly get screwed over this way? I'm gonna kill... I don't know. Today was wierd, due to lack of sleep from the previous night. I already napped. I can't even tell you how long I was out but I did NOT want to wake up. However I woke up feeling severely agitated with Alex, I wanted him to go away. Now, thats completely new. We need a bed... well, he has a bed but he is tortured by...his parents. They pay for his education... So what can we do? Nothing... Oh no... I left momentarily and Alex is already on his way back. For some reason, I am choosing to keep this secretive. Because now I can say whatever I want, and not have to worry about repricussions. Hope I spelt that correctly. Unfortunately you can never be too sure, can you? Haha, He went to get his hair cut, how do you think it looks? I hope it looks good, my boy looks good with long hair but its curly-ish so it looks messy, and his parents keep making him cut it. That's right, this day and age he can still say his parents made him... they got him under their thumb though because he really wants to finish college.... Two more years guys, think I can make it? Haha, I sure do. Can't imagine being without the boy.

I am in a little bit of a frenzy. I have maybe two hundred dollars left. And I don't know how long I'm going to need to make that last. Because I don't know when the hell CFS is actually gonna come through and pay my rent like they're supposed to. What kind of CHILD and FAMILY agency is gonna abandon an 18 year old girl in an apartment she can't afford

Random Facebook Status....

"Whatever u give a woman, she will make it greater. Give her sperm, she will give you a baby. Give her a house, she will give u a home. Give her groceries, she will give u a meal. Give her a smile and she will give u her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what she is given. So if u give her crap be ready to receive a ton of Shit. Post it on your wall if you agree."

March Fifth, Yet Again 10:07am

Did not sleep, went to class, almost fell asleep there... Boring. Got some resumes together, looked at numbers for massagers. Because of some unholy bundle of knots in my right shoulder. Strange enough though, I do everything with my left hand. And Arm and shoulder. Either way, its wierd. I figure I should call around and see what kind of prices I can get for that. Because apparently this month will be tight, right? No movies to pay... Just hydro..hm... So what am I so worried about? I don't know, either way, one should be prepared to starve in the months to come. Oh and pay for school. Crikey, I forgot about that. Alex, my unofficial fiance, thinks he did well on his math exam today. I'm glad, I was nervous for the boy, he was studying but he kept going over this one question, and I was thinking, what if he was doing it wrong? With all the love in my heart that is what I wondered. But what could I do, eh? Either way, he's done twenty minutes early. I'm going to have to like, seriously nap when I get home. But I figure this would be a great opportunity to apply at all the places I need to apply at. Random time to apply places right? The designated time to apply? Haha. So I got my payment. I'm pleased, or am I? I want to order pizza tonight, but for WHAT?! You know how much I don't actually like pizza? The crusts are always too stiff, there is always too much tomato sauce and there is never enough cheese, and even if there is enough toppings, they keep falling off. Its a hassle to avoid hassle. Ridiculous. I wish I could order Chinese or something but that's outrageous because my lovely fiance, does not like Chinese. GRE-AT! *grumps* I'm talking to my older brother John... Often signs off as (Johnny Garda.....) No clue what it means but he likes it so why not? I wouldn't mind having a brother Johnny. I have always called him John though. That is the name they gave me when I was ten and wondering who my siblings are. John, Jerry, Terry. Nobody told me it was Johnny, Jer and Terrence. Kidding about the Jer one. But the other are completely legit! Terrence actually gets a little fiendish if you call him Terry. Wierd thing about them is that they refer to OUR mother as YOUR mother. "You talk to your mother recently, kiddo?"

I have no idea what happends there, its been twenty minutes, I'm going to fall asleep...